45:36

RiaW #118: Breaking Dawn Review – Part 1

MP3

“Breaking Dawn” is the final book in the Twilight saga by Stephanie Meyer. Unlike the other books, which focused on Bella and Edward moping around and being all emo about nothing, Meyer opts for batshit crazy this time around.

For the first quarter of the book, “Breaking Dawn” follows the wedding nuptials of Edward Cullen and Bella Swan. They tell Bella’s parents, Alice dresses them up all fancy, they both say “I do” and then! And then! And then the moment we’ve been waiting four books for… they bone! And just like every other climatic moment in the series, Bella passes out for most of it.

The rest of this section is a confusing mess of Bella getting beaten up by Edward during sex, Bella getting pregnant with an alien baby, and then Bella getting beaten up by the alien baby. If Twilight has one message, it’s that Bella needs to be hurt.

Most of this podcast is us just trying to understand all this grossness, only to find that the next section is worse. Much much worse.

0 comments on “RiaW #118: Breaking Dawn Review – Part 1

  1. Carrie says:

    If nothing else maybe it will scare some of the wanabe 16 and pregnant girls out of breeding.

  2. Ralu says:

    Lunch, then sex.

  3. TooMuchFreeTime says:

    Was re-listening to this, when you guys mentioned wondering if Meyer was getting sea monsters and vampires confused, it reminded me of a fun mythology fact – in a lot of myths, if the mermaid didn’t eat you entirely, they did drink your blood. Not that I think Meyer has any knowledge of those myths. Just saying that blood-sucking sparkly fish-things aren’t outside the realm of myth.

  4. Alex Falcone says:

    This is very good information. I’m much less attracted to mermaids now that I know they’ll kill me.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Scroll to top