A bad pirate movie is like a bad pizza: it’s not impossible, but the ingredients were all there and you really shouldn’t have messed up something so wonderful. Cutthroat Island is a bad pirate movie.

Geena Davis and Matthew Modine (Bodine?) star is this nonsensical pirate action rom com. Few people are less believable as pirates and few pirates are less believable as love interests. But it isn’t without joy. There’s a musket-loading monkey, a map on a barrel of eels, and the movie ruined its production company. All of which is pretty fun.

Sarah Hatheway joins us to discuss the importance of a strong female character and we play a rousing game of King of Bullshit Mountain.