Avenging hasn’t always been exclusively the power of 2012 CG super heroes.  For a while, it was done by people with cheesy accents and hard-to-follow plot lines.

In 1998, a big budget adaption of the 1960s TV show The New Avengers was almost released, but then at the last minute it was cut from two hours to 90 minutes and pushed back into late summer and more abandoned into theaters than actually released.  Unsurprisingly, it didn’t do very well.

Despite having such fun actors as Sean Connery, Uma Thurman, and, with a grand total of one line, Eddie Izzard, the film is dismal.  It’s quirky without being funny, is thrilleresque without being thrilling and is British without seeming smart.  Thankfully, it’s short enough that we have plenty of time to go off on tangents about polar bears, super heroes, and the economics of bear costumes.